LETTER FROM ALAN - Spin Gurus

Hi. My name's Alan. Just taken over an airline and need a bit of help with some recent bad publicity. We have been flying people around Australia and the world since 1921. Seems some of our earlier planes were more reliable than our current fleet. We've had some parts falling off our jets recently and a few holes opening up at 40,000 feet. If it's not a hole in the plane it's complaints about not enough fresh air!!! It's hard to keep people happy. And then there's the delays. OK, we've had a bad run recently and dropped the ball in the area of punctuality. But it's not a bloody taxi service you know. These are complicated pieces of machinery that need highly skilled maintenance and care. That's why we've moved most of the maintenance offshore to third world countries. We've had one of the best safety records for an airline in the world... we've never lost a life on any of our flights. So we're coming from a very high base. We can't stay at the top for ever you know.... What do these whinging, whining, annoying passengers expect from us? We spin off a cheap-arsed budget airline with appalling service to give them budget flights. We give them a stale muffin and a cold cup of tea for FREE on the major airline. Really, what more do people want from us? So, Spin Gurus, what would you suggest? How can we fight this beseige from an arrogant media? How can we get back in the public's goodbooks again?

Lots of Love. Alan